Fairy Tale Love…Kind Of

Fairy tale love is the kind that happens when two people see each other and fall in love at first sight. There is no question, and there is no bullshit. They approach each other without fear, no one plays games, they start dating which flawlessly turns into a relationship, they get married, have kids and live happily ever after.

Sometimes this happens. You always hear stories like these, which become urban legends of sorts to hopeful girls and boys everywhere. But what about the rest of the time? Or when people settle in relationships? Too often I hear ‘settling’ stories from friends instead of ‘true love’ stories.

What is the difference? Here is when you know you are settling:

  • He/she was the best looking one there
  • I’m getting old and I want to get married and have kids
  • He/she won me over eventually
  • I hated him/her at first, but he/she grew on me
  • I was comfortable with him/her because I grew up with them
  • My friends set us up because they said he/she was attractive

Here is when you know you are not settling:

  • I walked in, pinpointed him/her from everyone else there, and then no one else existed
  • I heard their voice, I smelled them or felt their presence and it changed me
  • I loved him/her from the moment I met them
  • We grew up together, and we were in love since childhood
  • I was a different person until the moment I met him/her
  • He/she makes me want to be better, push harder, and makes me know that everything is possible
  • Nothing else matters except for him/her and this moment, right now

That is the difference between fairy tale love and settling. And granted, it is hard to believe in that type of love, especially since those stories are so rare they have fallen into the urban legend category. But it does exist.

So why are there more stories of settling and the fairy tale love stories are legends? Are we just the unlucky ones? Is our universal timing out of sync? Or is there something else that has nothing to do with destiny…

Maybe we have the opportunity for fairy tale love, but when it comes, we are so bitter, jaded and wounded that we are too scared to do anything more with it than fuck it and leave it before it has the chance to hurt us.

And so it goes. On and on. Until we realize settling is so much easier because it can never hurt us the way the demise of fairy tale love can.

funny disney princess fairy tale feminist

funny fairy tale disney princess

5 thoughts on “Fairy Tale Love…Kind Of

  1. The first one better reflects what I took from the movies.

    1)Sleeping Beauty was at least a step up. In the less child friendly original version, she gets raped by a king in her sleep. This king is married. In the end, the king kills his wife & keeps his new mistress, who had children against her will & has no say in any of it.

    2)The little mermaid is also a bad influence on teen girls. That’s right ladies, throw your family away for a CHANCE to get a guy who’s biggest problem in life is choosing between a brunette & a redhead.

    3)In the original Snow White, she’s 10 years old & the prince is a pedo-necrophiliac; He breaks into her coffin & violates her, which is how the apple piece she choked on gets dislodged.

    4)Cinderella is the really mastermind. She could have easily gotten out of her situation by marrying a man of lower class (her father was a merchant, her wardrobe would have made her ineligible to court classy men). She also could have left & gotten a job. But no, she had to marry above her caste, the richest guy she could find. The prince chose her because she was the only “princess” who wasn’t a cousin (royalty was very inbred).

  2. Anyone who takes the captions in those pictures seriously is obviously a moron who didn’t pay attention to the films (or lacks the brain capacity to remember them accurately). First off, prince Phillip fell for Aurora while she was AWAKE, in the woods, and not based on her looks; he was first enchanted by her voice. Aladdin fell in love with Jasmine when she was in disguise as a peasant woman; he had no idea about her political worth, and he ended up being the one who had to struggle to show HIS worth in society in order to be considered marriage material for her. Belle rejected the attentions of the handsome man in town and showed no interest in being married. She agreed to take her father’s place as the beast’s prisoner in order to save her father’s life, and fell in love with the Beast through their longtime interaction and acquired respect for one another, and she only realized her feelings for him once he set her free, and then she returned ON HER OWN ACCORD. Ariel expressed the desire to be a part of the human world before she even SAW prince Eric. And she never showed any interest in pursuing a future with her voice, that was all her father and Sebastian putting pressure on her. Sebastian said at the beginning of the film that she “never showed up for rehearsals”; not exactly a dedicated singer move. For 16-year-olds, and especially for their time periods, these women were all strong role models. Besides, as a child, you aren’t thinking of the sexual aspect of the sotries (unless you know way too much for your age), at least I wasn’t. I’m so sick of fem-nazi types trying to tarnish my favorite childhood stories due to their personal bitterness. I, for one, have a fairy tale relationship (ask anyone who ends up in our general proximity; even after all of the years we’ve been together, our chemistry is unbeatable), and I didn’t attain it by being a bitter woman or attacking harmless children’s stories.

    • I appreciate your honest comment on my blog post. However, you clearly did not read my post before you responded bitterly, in your own right. I am not bitter about fairy tales at all. In fact, I actually said this type of love definitely exists, as it sounds like you have which is wonderful. But these stories, in my opinion are few and far between, and my only point was that because the rest of us girls hear those fairy tales stories, we spend our entire lives looking for that, settling for relationships that are not ideal just because we feel the need to have this because of our fairy tale standard in our head. I said nothing about how any of these Disney characters fell in love, honestly it doesn’t matter to the point I am making. The only point is that these stories have hatched themselves in our minds and we cannot get them out and we all feel inadequate without it, which is very sad in my opinion, because everyone should feel satisfied and happy, with or without a relationship, and that is all. Clearly your need to retaliate to my opinion about this actually proves my point even more…as women, we will cling on to this ideal for dear life because without it, we are nothing (as we are taught).

      • I don’t think you’re bitter, but I liked Freyja’s comment for what she said about “fem-nazi” among other things 😉

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